Palworld Steam Reviews Know It’s A Slavery Simulator

A Pal holds a gun with a human on its back.

Image: Pocketpair / Kotaku

It’s been long enough that we can probably stop calling Palworld Pokémon With Guns,” right? Pocketpair’s monster-taming survival game has amassed millions of players, all while remaining legally distinct enough that The Pokémon Company’s lawyers haven’t come after them. But the jokes about copyright infringement aren’t the only ones to be made about Palworld, as has been made clear by the Steam user reviews the game has gathered since it launched in January.

The best jokes about Palworld are ones that point out how fucked up it is that you capture these monsters to force them to do manual labor. Steam reviews acknowledge that Palworld is about running a business of wild animals working their asses off for the cause. You capture a Pal, then they help you build a base, and they get a break when you say so. Palworld is actually a scathing commentary on capitalism and the deteriorating effect it has on all of us. Dolly Parton had lofty expectations for the modern-day capitalist hellscape when she wrote “9 to 5,” right? Eight-hour work day? Not for the Pals.

Others naturally make the Pokémon comparison and allude to a possible lawsuit that hasn’t happened yet. But the difference in overt brutality between the two has given folks a perfect window for good goofs and gags. Beyond that, there are an unsettling number of people who want to shtup the Pals. While that might sound disturbing, Pocketpair seems to be open to catering to that audience, considering it released a Palworld dating sim mock-up trailer for April Fools’ Day that would let players actually do that.

Here’s a handful of the best reviews for Palworld on Steam. Shoutout to the people who actually put work into their Steam recommendations because y’all are doing good work. Still, the best way to get any attention when doing user reviews is to give the best zinger in between the walls of text.

A Palworld steam review reading "It's like Pokemon, but you shoot them in the face and force them into unpaid labor."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "most accurate amazon warehouse simulator."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "my pals are overworked and underpaid just like me :("

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "My depresso got depressed. We cured it with medicine. My alpaca developed an eating disorder so we ate him. 10/10"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "War crimes, slavery, endless breeding farms, human trafficking, animal cruelty, animal genocide. would recommend"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "Get stranded on a beach and start punching sheep. This is Pokemon Black and Blue."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "Beat them up, enslave them, starve them, force them to breed, and then eat them when they get out of line. 10/10."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "Please don't let Nintendo take this away from us"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "i killed a mammoth with 20 campfires like our ancestors intended."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "don't worry, they love to work. they love doing their jobs"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "P.E.T.A's other favorite game."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "Protagonists in any Pokemon-like game: As long as we stick together, we can do anything. Protagonist Palworld: Commits enslavement, animal cruelty, poaching, murder, destruction of property, crimes against humanity (and every other species, for that matter), and unethical experimentation. 10/10"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "Imma make my own Pokemon, with blackjack and hookers!"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "Pretty sure my Pals are unionizing against me."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "It's a great game I'm just a hater"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "Let me sex the pals."

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

A Palworld steam review reading "dont get sued please"

Screenshot: Valve / Kotaku

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